fresh. but how fresh?

so i have this tendency to just pick up on go some times
perhaps that why i'm currently living in new york

perhaps thats why i own so many damn note books
that are 1/4 filled

i dont like to commit and i'm learning that all those things
i thought i wasnt, i am.

well certain things.
my attention span is short
(its gotten a little better)
and i am very random.
tho, bipolar may be a word that 'adults' use instead

and the working life of tired routine can
make u feel like a grandma's fart.

lame.

some times when you work so damn hard
wanting a better life, you forget the present one
you have.


i miss people back home.
but i love being here.
its hard.
choosing to grow and really
put your self in a potion to
just do it so raw
is a process,
but worth it.


i feel empowered.
lost at times,
but so damn good that i
am making it 3000miles
from friends family and
the comfort zone of life.


when you get out of your bubble.
mine happen to be san diego bubble.
its amazing to breath the air outside


though party back home is something
i reminisce about often,
and holy crap where those good times,
i'm proud of myself
that i'm doing something
beside let myself self destruct.


i say next,
Europe.